Tunnels

I know it seems as though I've really been down on myself lately, and in some ways I guess I have been. I come on here and write as often as I can because it's a good place for me just to get stuff off of my chest and out of my head. I think everyone should be afforded some venue where they can do it, most just don't take the time to put stuff down and out of their minds. I've been thinking a lot about things, and why I've always got that down in the dumps feeling. The best answer that I can come up with, is that I'm bored. It's funny that I come out and say that because it's kind of a running joke between a lot of us, we're always bored.

Well I can truly, all joking aside, say that I am bored out of my mind. There aren't enough things going on in my life to keep me close to entertained. I'm not the type of person who has to be entertained 24/7 so don't think that. I'm happy sitting on the couch and watching television, or just doing a lot of nothing. It's relaxing and good for the soul. It's not the small things that are boring me, it's the big picture. I can't wait for the summer to roll around so I've got 300 kids running around and getting in to things. That's really the highlight of my year, and I get it for 2 straight months, so who am I to complain now?

I was the first one awake on my trip to Houston on Sunday morning, so I fired up the ole' laptap and checked all the obligatory websites. Sports, news, facebook, myspace, etc. Then I started checking all the blogs I like to read pretty regularly. The ones that are to the right. After I had checked all of those, I started to read my own. That was really what made me realize just how bored I am. Reading what I've put on there the last few months has just been blah, boring. Has my life at this point really burned out this much? I meaFridayly, it's only friday nights and that's it! I'll go out that night, and I don't even always have a good time then.

I enjoy my job, actually I love it. If I win this big lottery tonight I'll do it the rest of my life (wishful thinking). I've always been the optimist. The one who finds the good in every situation, but I've found myself being very negative lately, and questioning a lot of things that I've never questioned before.

I'm not asking for help, or I'm not on here complaining. It's just such a realization that I had to write it down to believe it. I had such a blast this weekend, and it's really turned my head in another direction. I'm seeing the upside to a lot of things, and I actually had the chance to just hang out, have a good time, and not give a dang about anything else going on around me. Everything was taken care of, and everything ran according to plan. What more can you ask for? Since then I've actually gotten in touch with several people who I have been planning to get in touch with. Those who I haven't talked to in ages. It's been great, and it's gotten my head back up in the clouds where it used to reside.

The fact still remains that I am bored though. I'll figure this stuff out, and I can't wait until I do. I'm loosing all my hair (haha) because I'm stressing over stuff I shouldn't. It'll come sooner than later though...

on a different note, I'm glad to see that Tony is back up and blogging, check his link out over there. He's got a lot of interesting things on his blog...