Country Roads, Take Me Home
Well, it's finally happened, I'm back in Ingram. Bummer. It seems a month ago I couldn't wait to get out of Lubbock, but right now I'm missing my friends and the LBK life. I guess some sort of let-down was inevitable. Going from a place where there's usually always something going on, back to a place where the only thing going on is what you create takes a little getting used to.
A few months ago I guess I was missing the life that I had here. The friends that were my age, the ones I grew up with. Those are the folks that I've spent my life and most of my time with. Then this past month the world has kind of flipped around for me. I always enjoyed my LBK friends, but this past month was absolutely unbelievable.
I don't know exactly what made it that way, it may have been the lack of classes, or it may have been the fact that I came to the realization that I wasn't going to be there for much longer. Regardless of what exactly it was, this past month was the best time I had in all of my college. As much as I joke about being too old, I kind of am, I didn't feel it at all. I felt like part of the crew, equal in all aspects, always ready for something to happen. I finally dropped my guard and the fun just piled up. The house life was great too. It's the first semester that I remember never even once getting a little upset with a roommate. That's not a knock on my previous semesters, friends, or roommates at all either. My two previous college roommates are the best friends I've got in the world. I just went with the flow of things, and a great experience materialized.
I had planned on heading back this direction either Friday after my final, or early Saturday morning. When all that got pushed back to Sunday morning, that turned into afternoon, and I didn't end up leaving the LBK 'till around four. Part of that has to do with lack of sleep, and the other part has to do with just wanting to wait around until the next event popped up. I eventually pushed myself out the door though. I got to see a lot of friends this past weekend, and it'll leave me with a vivid, and great memory of Lubbock and my times at Tech.
When I walked into the house tonight, I was greeted by a flying little white dog. Jack Russell terriers, you have to love them. She met me as I climbed the two stairs into the kitchen. Another half a foot lower, and it might have been a disaster. She ended up bouncing off of my stomach, and then one more jump before I could catch her. She hasn't left my side since I got here, but I'm about to boot her out of my bedroom because she's a pain to sleep with.
When I made the turn around the refrigerator, my Dad was there, and that was the first post-graduation glance he had of me. My Dad and I don't really do the whole emotional, huggy, kissy thing, so there was none of that. Instead, it was more of a high five. That followed by the obligatory "how was the drive", and "you made it here too fast" questions. Then he asked if all of my grades had been posted yet, and I said no.
See there's some history there. Fall of '04, I came home thinking that I was finished. As it turns out, a D in an economics class doesn't spell diploma. So after the 8 month sabbatical from school, I had to go back to the LBK to get that piece of paper.
My answer was that, no, not all of my grades are posted, but there isn't a snowball's chance in hell that I didn't pass my other class. Then there was another a little happy sigh from him, I guess part relief and completeness, and some feeling of accomplishment on my part. After that the talk turned to different things, but nothing too serious. We talk a lot, never really serious stuff though. Every now and then, we have a serious talk. It usually has to do with something going on with a friend, or something about my Mom. I don't always say a lot. The one thing that I do need to say to my Dad though, is thanks. Thanks for everything. Thanks for paying for most of my schooling. Thanks for taking it easy on me when I had a sub-par performance. Thanks for so many things. Like I said though, my Dad and I don't really do the emotional thing, so I didn't. It's one of those unspoken things. He knows how much I appreciate him, and someday, when the timing is right, I'll tell him.
You know, as I sit here thinking about it, I guess the thing I should thank him for the most is patience. I don't know many other people who would have continued being the same way with me as he was. I have never really jumped off the deep end and done crazy things, but I have not lived up to my capabilities in many aspects of life. I know at times he's felt some disappointment that I was at this age, and not where I should be. By this time in his life, he already had is Juris Doctorate, and was practicing law. I guess I fell a little far from the tree than a lot do, but I like to think that I have other great qualities. (yeah, so maybe I am a little cocky).
So it's now back to Ingram/Kerrville. No I'm not going to disappear into Mexico, as tempting as it seems. I'm not going to go to Atlanta, although my Sister did call today and tell me that I should move out there and find a job. I would like to go for a while though. I'm not going to stick around here either though.
I'm sitting here, looking at my Lubbock life, packed up in trunks, and bags. It's a sad scene to think about. I'm somewhat hesitant to start unpacking it, because that makes it feel permanent. I don't want that.
I've gotten a little carried away tonight with this one, so I'll cut it off until another day. I hope everyone has a great Christmas, Holiday, whatever you want to call it, and I hope to see y'all soon.
A few months ago I guess I was missing the life that I had here. The friends that were my age, the ones I grew up with. Those are the folks that I've spent my life and most of my time with. Then this past month the world has kind of flipped around for me. I always enjoyed my LBK friends, but this past month was absolutely unbelievable.
I don't know exactly what made it that way, it may have been the lack of classes, or it may have been the fact that I came to the realization that I wasn't going to be there for much longer. Regardless of what exactly it was, this past month was the best time I had in all of my college. As much as I joke about being too old, I kind of am, I didn't feel it at all. I felt like part of the crew, equal in all aspects, always ready for something to happen. I finally dropped my guard and the fun just piled up. The house life was great too. It's the first semester that I remember never even once getting a little upset with a roommate. That's not a knock on my previous semesters, friends, or roommates at all either. My two previous college roommates are the best friends I've got in the world. I just went with the flow of things, and a great experience materialized.
I had planned on heading back this direction either Friday after my final, or early Saturday morning. When all that got pushed back to Sunday morning, that turned into afternoon, and I didn't end up leaving the LBK 'till around four. Part of that has to do with lack of sleep, and the other part has to do with just wanting to wait around until the next event popped up. I eventually pushed myself out the door though. I got to see a lot of friends this past weekend, and it'll leave me with a vivid, and great memory of Lubbock and my times at Tech.
When I walked into the house tonight, I was greeted by a flying little white dog. Jack Russell terriers, you have to love them. She met me as I climbed the two stairs into the kitchen. Another half a foot lower, and it might have been a disaster. She ended up bouncing off of my stomach, and then one more jump before I could catch her. She hasn't left my side since I got here, but I'm about to boot her out of my bedroom because she's a pain to sleep with.
When I made the turn around the refrigerator, my Dad was there, and that was the first post-graduation glance he had of me. My Dad and I don't really do the whole emotional, huggy, kissy thing, so there was none of that. Instead, it was more of a high five. That followed by the obligatory "how was the drive", and "you made it here too fast" questions. Then he asked if all of my grades had been posted yet, and I said no.
See there's some history there. Fall of '04, I came home thinking that I was finished. As it turns out, a D in an economics class doesn't spell diploma. So after the 8 month sabbatical from school, I had to go back to the LBK to get that piece of paper.
My answer was that, no, not all of my grades are posted, but there isn't a snowball's chance in hell that I didn't pass my other class. Then there was another a little happy sigh from him, I guess part relief and completeness, and some feeling of accomplishment on my part. After that the talk turned to different things, but nothing too serious. We talk a lot, never really serious stuff though. Every now and then, we have a serious talk. It usually has to do with something going on with a friend, or something about my Mom. I don't always say a lot. The one thing that I do need to say to my Dad though, is thanks. Thanks for everything. Thanks for paying for most of my schooling. Thanks for taking it easy on me when I had a sub-par performance. Thanks for so many things. Like I said though, my Dad and I don't really do the emotional thing, so I didn't. It's one of those unspoken things. He knows how much I appreciate him, and someday, when the timing is right, I'll tell him.
You know, as I sit here thinking about it, I guess the thing I should thank him for the most is patience. I don't know many other people who would have continued being the same way with me as he was. I have never really jumped off the deep end and done crazy things, but I have not lived up to my capabilities in many aspects of life. I know at times he's felt some disappointment that I was at this age, and not where I should be. By this time in his life, he already had is Juris Doctorate, and was practicing law. I guess I fell a little far from the tree than a lot do, but I like to think that I have other great qualities. (yeah, so maybe I am a little cocky).
So it's now back to Ingram/Kerrville. No I'm not going to disappear into Mexico, as tempting as it seems. I'm not going to go to Atlanta, although my Sister did call today and tell me that I should move out there and find a job. I would like to go for a while though. I'm not going to stick around here either though.
I'm sitting here, looking at my Lubbock life, packed up in trunks, and bags. It's a sad scene to think about. I'm somewhat hesitant to start unpacking it, because that makes it feel permanent. I don't want that.
I've gotten a little carried away tonight with this one, so I'll cut it off until another day. I hope everyone has a great Christmas, Holiday, whatever you want to call it, and I hope to see y'all soon.
posted by Sancho at 9:52 PM
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